Friday, April 24, 2009

common thread
a similar idea or pattern to a series of events.

A long time ago - when I had a proper job - I worked in a big open-plan office with lots of people.

One day, when I was sitting at my desk, I noticed a thread hanging from my trousers. I pulled it, thinking it would snap off. It didn't so I kept pulling.

Then I noticed a draught around my leg. I looked and saw that the outside seam of my trouser leg had completely come undone and was flapping around loosely, exposing my bare leg.

I was too bemused to be embarrassed.

For a moment or two I couldn't figure out what had happened. Then I realised.

I did the only thing I could think of. I grabbed my stapler. Holding my trouser leg together I shuffled out to the toilets. There I stapled the seam closed and made my way back to my desk ... feeling quite pleased with myself if I'm to be honest. I'd been a twat but got away with it.

I was uncomfortable for the rest of the day, but at least I wasn't exposing myself.

losing the thread
to not be able to understand something because you are not giving it all your attention

It's been a funny old week.

A number of good things have happened, but somehow I found myself getting increasingly disorientated.

I've been losing the thread.

I only realised it this morning when I was writing in my journal.

First I wrote out my feelings. Then I wrote out the facts. But I wrote the facts between the lines of my feelings. Then I wrote what I wanted to happen. Then I wrote what I need to do to make that happen. Everything on the same page, all overlaid and in between.

It became almost illegible (as you can see ... it's OK, I've censored it) but visually it pretty much summed things up. Lots of things going on ... lots of stories being told ... a number of agendas being worked out ... lots of activity ... lots of emotion.

And in and through it all runs the thread of what I'm doing.

hanging by a thread
to be in danger of having something unlucky or bad happen

I used to think it was just bad things that would knock me off course and even prevent me from doing what I want to do. The fact is, however, that a lot of bad things have happened and yet here I am still.

Now I realise that even good things can have the same effect.

I'm not yet strong or secure enough in who I am and what I'm doing that I can just get up every day and automatically get on with it - come rain or shine. I need to remind myself every day and renew my commitment to my agenda.
I do it by relentlessly journalling, making lists, jotting down notes, reflecting, reviewing, sketching, cutting, sticking ... and then going over and over it. I forget so easily and so quickly.

picking up the thread
to try to start something again, especially after problems prevented you from continuing

So I'm back on track ... fences, clouds, landscapes.

There will always be things happening that have to be accomodated, but as long as I can continue to follow the thread, I'll be OK.

My trousers might fall down, but I'll be OK.

Glad to hear your hanging on in there. I too have sometimes been feeling that I am losing the thread. I think it is probably to do with the fact I was revising and still assimilating all the information for my development management course, it was challenging my logical scientific mindset and also giving me so much information as to why this world is the way it is through its history that it was kind of like someone tipping a whole pile of information on the floor and I had to sort through it and put it into some kind of order for my brain to process and my brain would go off in so many different tangents as the information connected with experience. I just have a feeling that God is messing up the picture so that he can start to redraw the new environment.
Just... well...yes. Lots of nodding my head while reading this.
Joanna ... that's why I make loads of lists ... so that I can remember what the main thing is!

Angela ... so easy to get distracted, isn't it?
I'm glad you're back on track - but what solid conclusions have you come to about the 100 day experiment, thingy, wotsit?
Also, are you planning to loose your trousers on a regular basis? If so, I hope you'll remember to wear clean underwear!
Anonymous ... I've posted a response to the first part of you comment ... thanks for asking.

Re the trousers ... good job I wasn't going commando, eh?!
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